Puppy Love Triangle

Females. As a group, we’re emotional and often irrational creatures. How do we get this way? I’m not sure, but I finding that it begins early....in Kindergarten. Today I witnessed the tragic unraveling of a puppy love triangle. Girl A, we’ll call her Abby, loves Boy, we’ll call him Timmy. But, like many males, Timmy does not want the girl who wants him. He wants Girl B, we’ll call her Bonny. The main reason for not returning the admiration and affection of Abby is that she’s clingy. Really clingy. She gets upset if she can’t stand behind Timmy in line. She sits unnecessarily close to him during circle time. She chases him on the playground when it is clear that he is running away from her. Today Timmy had reached his limits.

During my recess duty, I heard crying and spotted Timmy sitting on a large rock, with Abby yet again, sitting as close as she could. As I came near I heard, “No. I don’t wanna be your friend!” These are harsh words when you are six years old. Abby let out a wail and wiped her runny nose with the sleeve of her pink plaid jacket.

“Yes!” she declared.

“No,” he repeated with a scowl, but made no attempt to move. I think he wanted/expected her to leave, but she didn’t. Instead, she tried to grab his arm, sobbing even more pitifully at this point. All the while, Girl B was sitting on an adjacent rock watching this dramtic exchange.

I felt I had to intervene. “Abby, I think Timmy wants to play by himself for a while...let’s go see what the other kids are doing.” My motion for her hand brought on another wave ofwailing and gnashing of teeth. “Nooooooo. I only waaaaaaant Tiiiiiiimmmy!”

Suddenly I had flashbacks to consoling distraught friends or roommates over their heartbreaks. I heard myself offering a 6-year-old essentially the same advice I had given them:

• Stop crying.
• Look around, there are other fun things going on that you can be a part of.
• You don’t want to be around somebody who makes you feel bad.
• Wipe your nose.

For a moment, it seemed to work. She calmed down and stopped trying to chase the boy who did not want to be caught. But she now seemed to need a new direction. I walked over to where she was standing and asked, “Okay, who are you going to go play with now?” Her eyes got a strange look in them and she yelled, “Danny!” This would be fine, except Danny (which not his real name), is a troublemaker. Go figure she’d pick him for a rebound. Again, I thought back to those friends and roommates. Once they stopped crying and looked around, some of them ran straight for a Danny. But Danny’s are never the answer. They aren’t worth half the trouble as the original Timmy. They just like being chased more. Oh, boy. What’s to be done? I’m just glad I’m not Abby’s mom and she’s not a teenager yet.